When I immigrated to the US 10 years ago, I was young enough to not take it too serious. The reality is that immigration is like the ocean being trying to live on the land. It’s really hard!
The first few years, I was just happy to be with Americans and people from other countries. So fresh! I even felt I was special when I was with them. Especially because I couldn’t fit into the strict Japanese culture, the freedom of American culture with the big land was like a dream, and I wanted to become an American so badly!
After three years or so, I started noticing the sense of discomfort in the cultural differences, food, and very simple things in a daily life. I want to eat rice. I want to bow. I want to feel the subtle care in the air. I was longing for the very foundational customs of Japan. I couldn’t blindly melt into the American culture anymore even I wanted. My body started alerting, and there were things I could not do no matter how much I tried.
I guess it was my experience of homesick. A very severe homesick. When I am in Japan, I can feel Japan-ness even in the bathroom, grocery stores, and public transportations etc. I am not talking about the high frequencies of the shrines or temples. I am talking about the daily feelings. Each breath I take, I can receive the air of Japan.
Obviously, the Japan-ness in the air is very thin in the US. It is almost impossible to receive it from the air. So I started eating more Japanese food, hanging out with my Japanese friends, and watching Japanese shows and movies. It works for a while, but it is not enough! I want more! It feels like a lack of oxygen; it is a lack of Japanese qi! I was Japanese qi deficiency. lol I didn’t know how much I was receiving from my homeland until I leave there long and far enough to feel the lack.
I guess, perhaps, maybe, it is in common for many of us, for the ones who are far away from the ancestors’ land. I remember it was mysterious for me that many of my American friends say like “I’m Irish American.” Or “My ancestors are from Germany.” Why Americans are not just saying “I’m American.” ?? Now I guess I get that. I believe it comes from the feeling of connections to the land of the ancestors. It is similar to my longing for Japan.
I think it is the main reason why I started learning Eastern medicine and being attracted by the ancestral healings. The homesick for the homeland takes me here.
Like a tree transplanted from a place to place, we too, it takes long time to grow its roots to the new soil and adjust for the new environment. It takes long time to get used to the new land with the respect and harmony to the native people, cultures, and environment while not losing the sense of self. It requires many tries and errors.
Through my own tries and errors, I found that making prayers for ancestors and my homeland is significantly helpful. The sense of Japan-ness that I was feeling from Japanese food, friends, and movies is there. I can feel the connection inside of my heart when I am tending to my ancestors and Japanese deities. Ahh, this is what I was longing for. The sense of connection to the home.
I highly recommend connecting to the homeland for immigrants, the second or the third generations, or whoever feel some kind of longings. The ways are different by person to person; it may come with cooking some traditional food, knowing mythologies, or whatsoever. The simplest way that I found is just saying “I miss you.” or “I love you.”to the homelands like when we talk to our families or loved ones. I believe we feel some sense of ease.
May we all feel the warmth of the homel inside.y way so far to connect with the Earth is through connecting to my ancestors and the pure essence of Japan from inside of my heart, and I want to cultivate it more. My real hope is that we all feel the sense of home no matter where we are, no matter what we eat, no matter who we are with. The connection is here, inside of our heart.
Lastly, I'd like to share a Japanese folk song called "Furusato," - My homeland.
Chasing rabbits in the mountains
Fishing little fish on the river
Dreaming about my homeland
Unforgettable my homeland
Wondering about my father and mother
Wondering about my dear friends
On the rainy days and windy days
My heart longs for my homeland
When I walk through my path to my destiny
I go back to my homeland, one day
The land with the beautiful mountains
The land with clear river
--
May we all feel the warmth of the homeland inside.
With love,
Kyoko
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